The Fragile Order of Grief: Remembering Michael Haughton

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Michael Haughton, the father of late R&B singer Aaliyah, died on November 8, 2012, at the age of 61. He passed away in New York. Her father was young just like my mom was young when she passed. It seems many parents die young in their 50s and 60s. Some parents do not live as long as grandparents. And Grandparents see their children die. Great grandparents have outlived grandparents. 

I noticed that God has taken a lot of people away, and death knows no age. Children also go but you expect the parents to go first. It’s not that way much anymore. I remember in my day growing up, parents were leaving and being buried first. It was seldom that I saw parents burying children. Now I’m seeing it a lot more.

Mr. Michael Haughton had to bury his daughter. I know he probably wasn’t expecting it. Now he has gone home. 

Eternity is Active

 

I don’t think God was through with Aaliyah. There is a feeling about it as I study who God is reading His word. Eternity is active: Heaven is described as a place of purposeful activity, worship, and reigning with Christ. It might be the reason we see loved ones that have passed in visions and dreams.I believe we can see our heavenly family. Three disciples saw Moses & Elijah. In Mark 9:23, Jesus said: “Everything is possible for 1 who believes.” There are a lot of great spiritual things God can give us, but we don't ask or seek.

The Mystery Dream - Aaliyah

Gail Nobles 6.25,’26

Often I say that dreams sometimes don’t mean anything. But when I dream about Aaliyah, I feel every dream is real. When she first died, knowing nothing about her the way I do now, I dreamed she was hurting, and I was hurting that she had passed. She spoke as if life let her down. I heard anger and tears. If she was hurting before she passed away, that I do not know. I’m sure she had some hurt. Who doesn’t hurt in life sometimes.

The very first time she spiritually came to me was no dream. She told me that I was her kin. When she first died, she came to me in visions and dreams regularly. It’s strange because she did not know me as far as I know. 

I don’t dream about Aaliyah now that much or see her in visions. Last year I dreamed about her in 2025. I dreamed she was in my grandmother’s old house. She was playing with two dogs. She kept her back turned as if she didn’t want me to see her. As she was playing with the dogs, one stayed close to her, and the other one left her and ran to the left. In the dream, she is present, but with her back turned as if she was hiding or distant from me. And I’m wondering why she appeared in my dream to my grandmother’s house. I haven’t been in that house since my childhood. My grandmother has passed and gone. I guess about the year of 1978. 

Then I saw an old man sitting in a chair with glasses on smiling at me. The dream took me away from Aaliyah for me to see him. I thought to myself: Who is he? I thought maybe it was a good sign for him to smile at me. I have never seen the man before in my life.

What does the Dream mean? I’m not quite sure unless Aaliyah is trying to send me a message about my family. I think about the dog that ran out of the house and how the other one stayed by her. Maybe she lost a dog in real life. In real life, she appeared to like dogs. I detect a loss.

I think about the old man in the dream. He was a stranger to me with an unfamiliar face. And I think about Aaliyah being distant in the dream. 

Maybe it’s all just a dream. Aaliyah was mystery-like in real life. She is a mystery in my dreams.

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Aaliyah Sang on Stage With Shirley Caesar

I am remembering the Christmas in Washington special! In December 1997, Aaliyah and gospel legend Shirley Caesar both performed at the televised holiday event held at the National Building Museum, singing in front of President Bill Clinton and First Lady Hillary Clinton.

At the grand finale of the show, Aaliyah, Shirley Caesar, and all the other guest artists took the stage together to perform "O Come, All Ye Faithful".

Some writers and media news people only remember the scandal and abuse stories about Aaliyah. But Aaliyah was more than that to me. Aaliyah was special, and I’m sure the people she began to sing on stage with knew.

Today, Pastor Shirley Caesar is singing and having conversation with children in her gospel song “We Love Our Children”(also titled "Pastor Shirley Caesar Talks to the Youth (We Love Our Children)"). It is a powerful spoken-word gospel song focusing on guiding the younger generation through societal pressures, crime, and spiritual struggles.

“America my heart is greed. I think about how our country has taken a turn for the worst. Crimes, drugs, ……”

 

 Shirley Caesar’s career began in 1951, when she signed to Federal Records at the age of 12. Throughout her seven decade career, Caesar has often been referred to as the "First Lady of Gospel Music" and "The Queen of Gospel Music"

Aaliyah Try Again Live on TRL 2000

 

 

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Aaliyah’s Try Again is a favorite song of mine. It is her performance on TRL 2000. Whenever she performed it, she looked as if she was having a ball. She looked pretty happy during the time of the song. It is the lead single for the soundtrack to her debut film, Romeo Must Die.

Aaliyah - I Don't Wanna Live on TRL (April 26, 2000)

 

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Sometimes I can’t say much. Aaliyah’s performance and talent speaks for itself. 

Lyrics: I don't wanna be Be without you, be without you I don't wanna live Live without you, live without you I don't wanna go Go without you,”

We don’t wanna be without her either.